Hola, Hart Beat. How’s your week going? I was in Vermont earlier this week and am back in Massachusettes now. I’m looking forward to getting a few things from my summer bucket list checked off. I think swimming and reading are in order this weekend. Plus, I just finished my book of the week and need to start a new one. 🙄
Meanwhile, in the land of the internet, I’ve been mulling over a conversation I had with two of my best childhood friends earlier this summer. Have you heard of the five languages of love? My friend Alli told us about the theory and we talked about it for a while over some wine.
The theory is based on a book written by Gary Chapman that argues there are five “love languages” that we, as humans, use to communicate love to each other. According to Chapman, each person has one primary and one secondary love language. The five languages are:
- Words of affirmation
- Quality time
- Receiving gifts
- Acts of service
- Physical touch
Furthermore, Chapman says that people usually look for love in the same “language” that they themselves give love. For example, if I’m a person that shows my love by words of affirmation then I look for love in words of affirmation back to me. It makes sense, right? We look for love in the same ways that we naturally give it.
When I was talking with my girlfriends it was so amazing to hear about the different ways we all crave love. One person’s “I love you” face to face is another person’s act of washing the dishes without having been asked or bringing flowers home. It’s an interesting idea. And, it might help in relationships, even if you’re not cut and dry one of the five. The chances of us finding a partner who expresses love in the same way we do is rare which means that you might have to look hard for someone’s signs of affection. Your partner might be telling you they love you in a different language and maybe with this idea, it could be easier totell.
Photo from Lost in Translation.