Advice on love and life

Hi. How’s your week going, Hart Beat? I’ve been reading up a storm and really can’t wait to tell you about this book that my best friend M. recommended to me. Have you heard of the internet advice queen Dear Sugar? I hadn’t either Hart Beat so don’t worry too much.

“I’ve consoled and counseled. I’ve listened to long and tedious tales of spectacularly disastrous romantic woe… Have you read Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet yet? People die because they want who they want. They do all kinds of crazy, stupid, sweet, tender, amazing, self-destructive things.

The book that I just finished reading, Tiny Beautiful Things: Advice on Love and Life from Dear Sugar and is written by none other than the amazingly lovely Cheryl Strayed. The book features a collection of letters seeking help and Dear Sugar’s brutally beautiful and honest responses. I’ve enjoyed reading it so much and have read it so fast that now all I can hear is Dear Sugar’s voice giving me advice in my own head.

“There are so many things to be tortured about, sweet pea. So many torturous things in this life. Don’t let a man who doesn’t love you be one of them.

The central piece advice that Dear Sugar seeks us to consider in most situations is to be true to yourself wholeheartedly. I think that’s the kind of advice everyone should hear most of the time.

“You aren’t afraid of love. You’re afraid of all the junk you’ve yoked to love. And you’ve convinced yourself that withholding one tiny word from the woman you think you love will shield you from that junk. But it won’t. We are obligated to the people we care about and who we allow to care about us, whether we say we love them or not. Our main obligation is to be forthright — to elucidate the nature of our affection when such elucidation would be meaningful or clarifying.
I’ll leave you with one last Dear Sugar advice for tonight. And then I highly recommend you go out and get this book to read on the subway or look through some letters she’s written tonight while you’re hanging out at home. They’re enlightening, Hart Beat.
“Cultivate an understanding of a bunch of the other things that the best, sanest people on the planet know: that life is long, that people both change and remain the same, that every last one of us will need to fuck up and be forgiven, that we’re all just walking and walking and walking and trying to find our way, that all roads lead eventually to the mountaintop.

Yours,
Sugar

2 comments

  1. First you post the short story from Radiolab that I’ve been deamily thinking of all day, then Dear Sugar, my bible?! I think we have a lot in common.

  2. Thank you so much for your lovely post KCZ! I’m so glad you enjoy the blog and hope that the posts coming this fall are also right up your alley!

    HB

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