Lemony Snicket on love

I will love you no matter how many
mistakes I make when trying to reduce
fractions, no matter how difficult it is to
memorize the periodic table. I will love you as
the manatee loves the head of lettuce and as the
dark spot loves the leopard, as the leech loves
the ankle of a wader and as a corpse loves the
beak of the vulture. I will love you as the
iceberg loves the ship, and the passengers love
the lifeboat and the lifeboat loves the teeth of
the sperm whale, and the sperm whale loves the
flavor of naval uniforms. I never want to be
away from you again, except at work, in the
restroom or when one of us is at a movie the
other does not want to see.

Lemony Snicket, The Beatrice Letters

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